Relax!
Great Sex Begins With Comfort:
Here's How to Get Comfortable

Sex has a boogeyman and its name is Guilt.  So many of us are taught that human sexuality and exploration is wrong, that we fear opening ourselves up.  Women in particular have many warped rules in this regard, placed on them by society that doesn't know what it wants.   Consequently, they may not understand how to relax with sex.

The first trick to getting comfortable with sex is defeating this bogeyman once and for all.  How do we do this?  Simple.  We have to own our sexuality and our bodies, understanding the responsibilities that come with sex (safeguarding health and the emotional well being of partners), while at the same time, allowing ourselves to relax with sex.

For women, the trick to relaxing with sex is overcoming initial shyness and taught ideals about female sensuality.  The rules of engagement, as it were, are to find a partner who is open minded and accepting of your ideas, choices and tastes.  For instance, a woman should toss any partner aside who makes statements like “I can't believe you like that?” or “Only sluts do that.”  Anyone who inhibits your growth certainly won't teach you how to relax with sex, and if anything, will make you shut down further.  Likewise, if you are an adventurous male, a prude will not be your match.

So, the first rule of thumb for getting comfortable with sex is to find a partner who has no true inhibitions.  Such a person will accept your preferences, fetishes, likes and dislikes, without judgment.

In this environment you will evolve and flourish.  As your confidence in this arena grows, you will become automatically attuned to partners that match your sexual proclivities, further enabling you to relax with sex.  Soon, no one will be able to make you feel bad about your choices.  Individuals stupid enough to try will get their walking papers the second they start.

Other aspect of getting comfortable with sex are physical.

Literal comfort has its place with making one relax with sex, so certain items can make this happen, most are a matter of choice.

One thing that can help with comfort is the aid of cushioned wedges, ramps and cubes that allow for easy positioning.  These items aid Kama Sutra and Tantric sex practitioners in achieving difficult poses.  Cheating?  Maybe, but getting comfortable with sex is all about ingenuity – besides, the position can last longer and bring greater pleasure with support.  Downside–these items can run a bit expensive, ranging from $85–$125 dollars.

An inexpensive alternative is the use of pillows, which can be used to elevate the hips or incline your partner for deeper penetration.

Scented Candles lend a bit of aromatic ambiance, and the right scents can help you in getting comfortable with sex.  Also, lowered lighting lends to the erotic atmosphere and can be a bit more mood enhancing than darkness.

A hot shower or bath, preferable with your partner, can release tensions that build up during the day.    Hot water coupled with oils or bath salts can send your senses soaring and relax the muscles, which always makes getting comfortable with sex easier.

Sensual music playing softly it the background doesn't hurt either.

Relaxing with sex is really a twofold process that involves getting rid of societal and/or parental programming when it comes to sexuality as well as finding ways to increase physical comfort and relaxation.  Implementing these two things will make sex more enjoyable, and your erotic journey a grand adventure.